Encouragement to See the Bigger Picture

Original Entry: Not Misunderstanding Our Husband's Love.

Our little baby was in the high chair tonight doing a little motion dance with her head rapidly.  She was obviously enjoying her spaghetti I had ground up in the food grinder.  Our baby high chair is wooden and has a high back reaching to the bottom of her neck, and she can lean back on it if she wants to.  Her papa (my husband) saw a potential accident and warned her and asked her to stop.  The potential accident that my husband saw was that if she is too wild with her little happy high chair dance, she will bang the side of her head on the back.  Our girl didn’t understand that the warning was for her protection and she began to whimper and reach out her arms to me.  I leaned toward the high chair and hugged her and explained to her that her papa loves her.  He didn’t want her to hurt herself.  She resumed to the dance and actually did end up hurting herself a bit on the head.

As I observed the scenario, I realized that I am like our baby in some ways, as it relates to understanding.  Because I am much older, though, and able to understand more, not misunderstanding my husband’s love should come easy!  Sometimes my husband will say something to me to warn me because he loves me and is trying to protect me.  I may not see it that way at first, but indeed, he does quite often see the bigger picture.  

 My entry now:  I think if I look at my husband's encouragements and exhortations to take them seriously and with self-control, listen and obey, God will bless this.  Nice reminder as I am going through older blog entries.

Diligence in Supporting

Original Entry: I Support Him.


            Before I got married, I knew I wanted to marry someone I knew I could help, serve, love, and support, and I had an idea of the kind of man that would be (of course I did not know who).       The man who is my husband, I support him, his life, his heart, his characteristics, everything I love about him.  I support him by cooking for him, cleaning for him, just simply supporting his welfare.  He is the man I chose to marry, and I married him to love him more by supporting him.

            A tip on supporting our husbands I have been thinking about lately that helps me is about supporting him financially, and it doesn’t mean how it might sound, giving him money!  There is a way a wife can support financially without having a job and it is simply to be frugal with spending and knowing his saving and financial goals.  The tip on helping financially has to do with when you shop.  Of course I don’t know what your husband makes an hour.  Consider what he makes, and if he’s on annual salary, do an estimate for each hour.  When you shop, as you are considering what he makes, ask yourself about what you buy… (for example, if he makes $12 an hour, and there is a package of walnuts or a new shirt for yourself that is $12) “Is this worth my husband being away from me for an hour?” 

            Men generally do not like being away from their wives and family for work, so when you shop, put this question into practice.  It should help you realize your husband’s significance and work and effort he goes through to help his family.  

 Entry now: I support my husband "financially" currently I am doing this thing where I have written down how much we spend on groceries, each week.  I keep the receipts in an envelope then I add them up around Saturday at the end of the week and keep a list of all the figures.  I am going to be trying to be more diligent looking for more less expensive foods.  We have about 4 large grocery stores in the area, so the receipts when I am through adding them up, I put them in another envelope, and I will look through and see which foods I can shop for cheaper at which store.

Healing the Wounds

Original entry: Words of Approval.

            When I communicate to my husband that his work is good or pleasing to me either with a smile or words, it really does so much for him, and it is encouraging for me as a wife to know that this means so much to him.  It is fulfilling to encourage him. 

How I can know it is encouraging to my man to speak words of affirmation to him is that it is encouraging through affirmation for me to hear those words from him.  I know words of assurance are a relief to me, and it is a relief for everyone really, who needs that affirmation and approval.  My husband told me simply, “You’re doing a good job,” as he was relaxing on a chair after work.  He was referring to a chore I was in the middle of doing.  It just made me so content as I thought on his words as I finished the chore.  I wonder how content a husband must feel who hears similar from his wife?  I had heard before I was married that husbands respond so so very well to words of affirmation, and it’s so true I have found!  These words include words of submission, adoration, and affirmation.  These words are ultimately words of approval.  A man truly can live so much better with generous doses of words of affirmation from his wife each day!

Entry now: Each word has affect on everyone you say them, too, and sadly for me, the unkind, silly words cannot be taken back.  It is not just my husband I have said unkind, silly words to.  But there is hope.  If you have said unkind, silly words to others or your spouse, you can help heal those wounds by saying kind, healing, uplifting words, and those wounds will heal.

Try to Be Perfect

Original entry: "I am not perfect."

I am not perfect.  I hope that many of you by my posts don’t think I have it all together.  I think that by writing on a topic, it helps me to think on it, and writing on a topic and thinking on a topic helps me apply it.  For that reason, I really enjoy keeping the blog, and I encourage wives at the same time by inviting wives to write guest entries.  

I am not writing to show “what a great person I am” (‘cause I’m not: all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God). 

I am aware that there are many encouraging-wife type blogs and websites out there!  I know this, because I have been encouraged by one in particular.  I am going to tell you about it very briefly and let you do the exploring.  It’s peacefulwife.com, and the subtitle is “The Joy of God’s Design for Wives and Marriage.”  I am so glad that I have come across this website.  I am so glad for growing and studying and encouraging my friends who are wives, and I am so glad that I was not expected to be perfect on day one of my husband’s and my marriage, ‘cause I certainly was not.  I am so glad for the space and opportunities and desires from God to grow more in the area of being a better wife than I was a week or month ago.

My updated entry: I am still not perfect (of course, ha ha).  No one will be perfect until one reached Heaven and enters into God's glory there with Jesus.  I believe it is good to try to be perfect, though, just because Jesus commanded, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your father in Heaven is perfect."  I have honestly not looked at peacefulwife.com in a large while, but I had a look at it, and I am very glad that her blog is still there!  I might have a look more at it later.